One with the Music

This is going to be a very different blog from my previous ones. As some of you know we are going to perform the Brahms REQUIEM on Sunday, April 18th, with a chamber orchestra. Since last summer I have been living with this music, studying references, listening to recordings, analyzing the music (note by note), doing all the things a conductor needs to do to get to know the music intimately.

I have to tell you that I have had some of my highest spiritual moments listening to this music. As far as it is possible (in that I remain firmly planted on this earth) I have been taken to Heaven. I have been "face to face" with my mother. You see, Brahms wrote this as a tribute to his mother whose death greatly impacted him. There are moments of incredible beauty and purity; there are also moments of powerful reassurance. There are even moments where "we shake our fists in the face of death" and shout "O death, where is thy sting? Where is thy victory?"

I am an incredibly blessed man; I have my health, an incredible partner, wonderful, healthy children and beautiful grandchildren, plus this job where I'm so totally fulfilled and given so many gifts on a daily basis. I don't understand why God has singled me out and given me so much; I certainly don't deserve it.

I guess the one area that I am challenged in is this: I can't get everyone to feel the music as I feel it. I want them to be able to "go" to the same places I'm able to go. It is both a blessing and a curse; it (that place) gets lonely. I'm sure we all have "our places"; that's what makes us different. It has just been such a blessing this week to be "one with the music".

Thanks for listening.